Post by Kevin Mears on Jun 27, 2022 17:41:21 GMT -5
On Camera
Location: Somewhere in Atlantic City, New Jersey
The interior of the Borgata Casino can be seen as it’s just another night of business. Several people are playing the slots, a few at the blackjack and poker tables. As we see this, a tapping noise is heard just behind the camera before it turns around to see the cane of Kevin Mears tapping a keno table in an open red silk shirt. He’s also sporting purple sunglasses that match his hair.
KEVIN MEARS
Hey hey, I didn’t pay you to come shoot these losers throwing their money away. You’re here for me. And if you want a bonus, you’ll keep that thing pointed on the next big thing in Uprising…and the last one too. Now let’s get to why you’re here and why I am. I watched the last episode of Revolution: Bad Moon Rising. Watched it end to end, and I gotta tell you the best part of the show was the crowning of a new Uprising World Champion. And like I said, Hot Girl Summer has a whole new meaning as a result. Long may she reign. There was also a match for the Splat title. Congratulations on being the champion of a sound effect, I guess. Apparently, she’s also the champion of the multiverse, I hope Marvel doesn’t find out she’s ripping off the new Dr. Strange movie. But the thing with Hot Girl Summer got me to thinking.
He tapped the end of the cane very lightly against his chin before snapping his finger.
KEVIN MEARS
The fact is yours truly is about to make his Uprising debut. A historic night in the lineage of this company, and that person I face, whoever it is, gets to say they were in on the ground floor of the greatest career to ever be part of this promotion. And you know me, I’m a generous guy. I give to charity all the time. Just now, I’m giving all these people something to aspire to be. They’ll never get there, because let’s be honest, look at me…and look at them.
He shook his head at the very thought.
KEVIN MEARS
But what I was thinking about was….why be selfish? Why just let myself be the focal point…the star attraction…..the center of attention…when I can have a little eye candy on my arm for that debut? After all, the neckbeards in the crowd should have something to look at and wish was on their arm, while their wives, girlfriends, and single women around the world get that twinkle in their eyes and that tingle in their thighs. So tonight, I’m beginning the Kevin Mears Eye Candy Contest. All you have to do is follow me on my Twitter account…there should be a graphic with that right about here…
He points down towards the bottom of the screen as his Twitter handle appears: @finditformekev
KEVIN MEARS
And whichever of those female followers direct messages me with the best pitch…the best reason….that they should be part of wrestling history in this company. She gets to be in my corner the whole match. And I’ll even pay for travel. Told you I was generous. Contest starts now, and believe me when I tell you this will be a moment unlike any you’ve ever had in your life. You get to be seen on whatever this Splat thing is, and most importantly, seen with me. So start planning and thinking, ladies. There’s only one person who can bring you a life-changing opportunity like this. And that’s me… because I’m Kevin Mears, and what’s your excuse?
Kevin taps the floor twice with the can, giving the camera operator a look after a couple seconds.
KEVIN MEARS
I told you that was the cut sign! That’s it, you’re getting half pay, shithead.
He turns and heads off in the opposite direction before the video cuts.