Post by J on Dec 26, 2020 15:34:50 GMT -5
// Off Camera//
“In Good Company”
December 26th 2020
Reno Nevada
Silence pervaded the room as Luther Thunder found himself drifting in and out of thoughts, full from his hearty lunch and without a care in the world, he sat back in his comfy chair. Life really was good.
“OH MY GOD, WHAT A CUNT!!!”
Luther snapped out of his daze with a start. Surely such a vile exclamation could not have come from his most precious flower? Looking across to his wife, she sat behind a laptop, seething; something Luther himself had done many a time by now. How did Esme react in these situations?
“Language?!” he blurted out, a little unsure of himself.
“Luther Marcellus Thunder, you come read this shit right now! This jumped up little Finnish fathead must be back on the pills or something!”
He gets up with a groan, still full from the delicious lunch making his way to the laptop.
“They do tend to enjoy the finest beverages during the holidays, so what? Let him enjoy himself, even the old dogs find a fresh bone sometimes..”
He leans over his wife’s shoulder and reads through the timeline as she highlighted some of the messages from the self proclaimed verbal shrapnel grenade. Then busts out a laugh.
“Wow, I don’t think anyone’s ever compared me to Hitler before! That’s a new one, think we should send him a thank you card, fruit basket or maybe a little bottle of the bubbly for creativity?”
Esme blinked. “Wait, you think this is FUNNY? That’s a vile thing to say! It’s 2020, you can’t say stuff like that! He, he--”
Her words were cut off by Luther’s booming laughter.
“THIS ISN’T FUNNY! HE IS CALLING YOU A GENOCIDAL CULT LEADER! YOU! A MASS MURDERER! WHAT’S SO FUCKING FUNNY ABOUT THAT?!”
He stands there wiping tears from his eyes.
“Well my dear, you know there are theories that Hitler himself wasn’t even in charge that he was just a puppet for someone smarter than him, a mere figurehead and poster boy for the third reich, besides..I believe I still have both of my balls left so I couldn’t possibly be Ol’ Adolf..”
She grumbles and looks at him.
“..for now at least, but the fact of the matter is that this is YOUR next opponent, your fellow title contender, comparing you to one of the most evil men in history, mentioning Stalin and Hitler..”
He chuckles.
“..and my third grade teacher said I’d never amount to anything, take that Mrs. Van Der Donck!”
Esme sighs, throwing her hands up in the air. “Fine. But this snivelling garbage still makes my blood boil. I mean... it’s YOU... how could anyone say-- I don’t understand.”
“He’s probably drunk off his arse or something, who cares?”
“I do! I care Luther!”
He nods.
“Alright, but who the hell even reads Twitter during the holidays..bet you no one even saw it..”
“I READ TWITTER DURING THE HOLIDAYS AND I SAW IT and while this is all well and good for you to have a chuckle at IF you do not get that camera set up so we can clear this nonsense up I am promising you that our anniversary coming new years is going to be a very cold and lonely one for a certain husband of mine..”
His laughter cuts off like from a switch, shock in his face is evident as it’s her turn to smirk.
“..who knows maybe Eva Braun can come warm you up..Adolf..”
“I’ll go get the camera.”
“Love you too Luthie!”~
//On Camera//
We open the scene in the rather nice hotel room of Mr & Mrs Thunder where Luther is kicking back, a sly smirk on his face. His wife Esme, on the other hand, seems a lot more focused and grim.
Esme: Well, well, well. I was just having a nice time perusing social media today, perhaps looking for some cute cats or honking birds, but instead I, like many other fans of the Revolution, found myself getting a little history lesson from one Mr. Tirri. Waving the Finnish flag and barking about dead Soviets like a full paid up member of the True Finns. You know what, nevermind. I didn’t get into this video to discuss the inner machinations of Finnish politics. Do you know why, Mr. Tirri? Because as much pride as you take in your homeland... nobody cares.
She shakes her head.
Esme: I understand many of our fans are not familiar with European history, and so may take your comments at face value, that Finland is some kind of powerful warrior nation with a rich military history whereas the Netherlands are a bunch of white-flag wearing crybabies. Mr. Tirri, as you full well know, the Netherlands are one of the top four European colonial powers, conquering vast territories on multiple continents, not least in Africa. Master traders and a huge naval and military force, while your ancestors were no doubt singing about some faeries in a wood somewhere. But let’s make something clear here, my husband is not Adriaen Van Der Donk, and you sure as shit are not Lauri Törni or Simo Häyhä. Great men, true embodiments of Finnish pride or sisu if you prefer and reasons for your country to be proud. Modern Finland, however, seems to show great pride if an American b-tier celebrity's wife pisses herself in a Finnish sauna. Your nation and national press reaches out and clings onto any scrap of relevancy it can get it, mentions in foreign media. The American president may be a dumbass, but he didn’t even know your president’s name. As I’m sure most people watching don’t. Face facts, Mr. Tirri, all you are doing with bringing up all this historical, sentimental nonsense is a blatant attempt to cloud the skies, to muddy the waters. You want to try and create some kind of narrative, anything that stops people focusing on the fact that it is YOU vs. LUTHER in a fight for the title in a month or so. Because the simple fact is, you don’t want this to be about wrestling, about promotional skills, charisma or anything relevant to the here and now, because You do not STACK UP to my husband in ANY of these categories. So bring your shrapnel grenades and your pet purple dragon and all the beer you can fit in your cheap rental and TRY. Just TRY match up to Luther Thunder. You’d stand about as much chance as the modern Finnish military has of fending off the Russians in 2020.
Her husband who had smiled wider and wider by the moment she went on gestured at his wife.
Luther: Isn’t she ferocious? I mean a lot can be said about my choices on employers or tag partners but none if you can’t say that about the one I chose to marry. She is just perfect.
He sits up from the lounging position and seems to look a bit more serious his palms gently together he leans in closer to the camera, hunching his massive frame a bit.
Luther: Now a lesser man could have gotten really upset or offended about your insinuations Don, really. In the current times and political climate around the world and such, someone who didn’t know any better could have gotten hurt, real hurt and probably angry. Not me though, you know why that is Tirri? It’s because I know YOU and I know how you are, your mouth goes a mile a minute and there have been countless times when your mouth spews out your thoughts before you have a chance to think if it’s wise or not. I appreciate that in you, because in the end you speak what you think. Against someone like you I will never have to wonder what you actually mean to say or ponder any ulterior motives on your verbal weapons of mass destruction, besides as someone who’s spent my whole career being insulted and mocked by my opponents. I gotta hand it to you pal, you found a insult no one has used yet, none of the tired and worn out same ol’ same ol’ jokes. Goes to show that as a native speaker from a land known for it’s clever tongue and verbage you probably have to actually limit your delivery and dumb down your skills just so that the rest of the world can understand it, a shame really since with a mouth like yours. I bet you could sing into the swamps most of the good talkers in this business as I believe your national epic describes a wise man once doing with his Finnish zither. So please understand what I am trying to tell you here.
I for one do not have a problem with you, I have never had, but you and me we have never really been part of the same groups have we? Our paths have gone different ways most of the time and while we have been employed by same people our positions in the totem pole of the said organizations have been, well for the lack of better word: Different. So while I am looking forward to Coronation just as much as anyone and understand just how much of pressure we both are under to perform at our very best there is a part of me that wonders if your focus is where it needs to be right now. You and me are both in a match yes, but we also have a match against Kalinda, someone you praised after your last encounter and there is still weeks before our big one on one match and as the old saying goes, nothing is as certain as uncertain. It rings very true especially in our profession so a friendly suggestion from one foreigner to another in this country. Why don’t we take it one match at a time. I appreciate the little nods now and then the nudges that you haven’t forgotten me, the sheer flattery that it is for you to bet actual money on my matches and seem to make some sweet profit on it all or even warning my opponents on who they are about to face when going against me. That is all well and good and I thank you for that, with all the honesty and sincerity in my heart.
He smiles at the camera.
Luther: Kiitos, Tirri. Kiitos for all the free publicity you have done for me in UPRISING, I don’t even need a PR team because between your verbal promotions in tweet or video form and my precious delicate little flower over here. I barely have to do anything except show up, do my thing and leave. In a different life, different world and a different time, who knows mayb the three of us could have made a heck of a trio together.
Esme puts a hand on her husban’s shoulder and he puts one of his palms over the back of her hand.
Luther: We’ll have our time in the spotlight Brother Tirri, a spotlight that we have both earned and something nobody handed to either one of us, however there is still time for that to happen and a lot of things may still change, let’s not give the fans or our peers too much of the delight before they have deserved it. So this upcoming match at Revoluiton 4 You, Me and Kalinda the three of us can showcase just what it is we are all about while the premise of a Finn,Dutchman and a dragon sounds like a bad joke starter now, we’ll see if anyone in the crowd dares to laugh when the night is done or will they appreciate what they have witnessed, giving us the standing ovation we have been deserving for years. Until then, I hope all of you watching will have wonderful remaining holidays and a great end of the year, 2021 is leering in and together we can all do our part to make it a whole lot better than the ending year has been.
With that we fade to black on the happy couple looking at the camera.